Wednesday, May 25, 2005
hAha... today is the 2nd day of school. Since the start of of school then i got the getting older feeling. hAhaha... no more being freshies.. =P
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Anyway.... Business Law is making me feel so stupid. hAha... i cannot understand it. I want to use this chance to learn Law... and sue ppl till they go mAD~! hAhaha... eviL~ Joking only... hMm... IFA.... haiz... i also cannot understand. hahaha... then i cannot remember how to do it also. Sian. Everything also dun know how to do... How to live up to my parents expectations. This semester... hair will turn white. hAhaha... jk
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hAha... and i just realised.. Jenny from forever 21 only gave me... 8 out of 12 songs for Avril Lavigne. *Sob soB* haha.. but it is gOod enough to make me happy listening to her songs. hEehx... the rest in the cd are from Simple Plan - No Pads, No Helmets, Just Balls. hAha.. the title already made me laugh.. -___- The songs are nice anyway. hMm.. i think she also added some songs from Me against the world. hEehx... anything bahz. Think on Friday i will ask her again. hAhaha.. if not i have to search for the songs myself. So bOring.
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hahaha... losing grip. i meant... is so unatural to do so many things. This is not my attitude or whatever. hAha.. losing myself. Not the extreme. hAha... i dun know how to explain. The feeling is like a big gap i dun like. hAha... the gap caused by what? hAha... coz of my fear. Afraid to offend ppl. hAha... also because of this i am quite an introvent. I dun understand how i live my life when i was in Primary school. hEehx.. Must be because i am more daring or what. Dun care whatever... what to fight.. come on and put a good fight with me. But now i am not mahz... =P more gentle... XD
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No matter what i do... it is in me. hAha... i just hope to be the a bit more daring me. So difficult. How i wish some things in Secondary school didn't happen at all. All the confidence is driven away during that period of time. How to get them back... the things i lost. hAha... learn everything and install everything again arhz. Difficult worx. hAhaha... i need someone to lead me out of that little room that i locked myself in... Of coz is step by step!!!
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hAha... i tried to talk... but no sound and mind is blank. hAha... Disa asked b4.. how come u so quiet.. hahahaha... everyone will sure ask me this qns.. =P
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hOw i wish i can be cheerful like Disa... the real one.. and Witty like Marvin... Serious like Marie... Cute like Mariyana... Happy like Nimfa... Also cute like Doreen... Winnie.. hMmm.. i dun know.. heehx.. coz she also so quiet. a bit Funny like Levin... Like to scare ppl like Simon.. =P Observent like Jacylen... Cute again like Yati... and a lot lahz... heehx... but ultimately... i will still be myself... coz i am me...
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I need this and that... I guess i have this... but not that. But everyone tot that is i have this only... i can stay alive... but i also need that. It is not what u all think.
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+___ Lead me out of this little room ___+